6 Qualities of My Perfect Woman

A few days ago I posted about how NOT to set me up on a date. And on my About page, my bucket list says that I want to marry the most perfect woman in the world and raise a family together. Well I’ve received quite a few remarks about how unrealistic that is, because no one is perfect, and a few questions about how to properly go about setting me up on a date. So, today I’m going to give you guys the description of my perfect woman.

To start, my perfect woman doesn’t have to be a supermodel. I mean… a regular model is fine.


In all seriousness, I don’t really have a “look” that I prefer. Some guys like tall, short, blonde, brunet, freckles, tan, etc, but I don’t really have any of those. The only qualification is that I would prefer a girl who isn’t taller than me. I’m 5’10, so it isn’t usually a problem, but from time to time it happens. The thing I care about is simply being attracted to her. Can’t blame me for that, can you? So, number 1 attribute of my perfect woman: I’m attracted to her.i-dont-always-find-the-perfect-girl

Of course, she needs to be attracted to me too. This is where so much of my dating problems arise! How do you get a girl to like you? That’s a post for another day I suppose. So, of course, number 2: she is attracted to me.

Now this is where things start getting tricky, because 1 and 2 are the most basic things ever. So here we go…

Number 3 on my perfect woman list is that she makes me want to be a better person. If I’m dating someone who doesn’t make me want to be better for her, I loose interest in the relationship pretty quickly. How boring would your life be if you always stayed the same and never tried improving yourself or becoming a better person? I’m not saying I want to change who I am for a girl, I just want her to motivate me to be the best version of myself possible.

Number 4: we share spiritual/religious views. This one may not be popular with today’s culture, but for me it is very important that I find a girl who will be supportive of me in my religious beliefs. A big part of my future is going to be raising children, and I want to do that within my church. I want a wife who will not only support me in that, but who wants the same thing.

Number 5 on the list is that our personalities mesh well. I don’t want to have to pretend to be different or have to constantly being trying to impress her. She needs to love me for who I am, and vice-versa.

Number 6: I want a girl who is confident and sure of who she is. I’ve found that the most insecure girls are the ones who take themselves the most seriously. Everyone needs to be able to laugh at themselves every once in a while. I don’t want a girl who has to spend thirty minutes choosing which Instagram picture makes her look less fat. I want a girl who can go on a hike without putting on enough make-up to walk the red carpet. Don’t listen to One Direction. They are liars. You should be self-assured enough to know that you are beautiful, no matter what lighting you are in or how long your hair took. A girl who doesn’t need gimmicks to feel good about herself. That’s what makes you beautiful.

I guess all of those points are just one very long way of saying: I have to love her.

My roommates and friends often give me grief about being “too picky” when it comes to the girls I date (or don’t date). Maybe it’s true. Maybe I am too picky. But can you blame me? I’m looking for the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with! I don’t want to settle. I don’t expect my wife to actually be perfect, but I think if she can hit these six points, she’ll be perfect to me.

***This list is subject to change as I continue dating and discovering things that I do/don’t want in a future wife.

***The supermodel/regular model line is a great joke taken from the song That’s All. It’s pretty hilarious :)

20 thoughts on “6 Qualities of My Perfect Woman

  1. Hi TJ… I have been following your blog since I came across it through blogging101. I enjoy reading your posts.
    For this particular list – which is a great one btw, guys your age don’t bother so much – I have a question for you.
    So you mean if you fell for someone (read fell in love) and she doesn’t fulfill one or two criterias on your checklist….what would you do?! Hope to get a reply :D
    (And I also hope you aren’t inspired by Ted Mosby too much!)


    1. thanks so much! my list isn’t so much a list of “deal breakers” as it is preferences. If i fall in love with a girl who doesn’t match one of them, I wouldn’t just break it off. i would find out why she didn’t fulfill it and judge based on what was happening. It’s hard to say what i would do because every situation would be different, but in general, these are pretty easy things to fulfill so there would have to be a reason for her not to. and no, i’m not inspired by Ted Mosby haha. lots of people have told me that i would like that show but I tried watching and just didn’t enjoy it, mostly because i didn’t like Ted. :)


      1. haha.. was kidding about Ted anyway!
        Well I was basically hinting at #4 coz that seemed to be a ‘deal breaker’ on the list….rest is just perfect! (your life, your list, I should stop being nosy now) :D
        and I wish you all the best in finding ‘the one’ for you. :)

        Liked by 1 person

  2. People get so confused when someone says the “perfect” person. Yes there is a perfect person. They are perfect for you. If they were perfect for anyone else then…they aren’t perfect for you. So go get her.


  3. Hey! I have been married, happily, for 28 years. You do not have to worry that your standards are “too high”. They are right on target! What makes my marriage work is we agree on financial goals, we are both independent of each other yet mesh as a couple, I still look at my husband and think “man he is good looking”, and our marriage is built on faith. Stay true to yourself and you will find her!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. “Of course, she needs to be attracted to me too. This is where so much of my dating problems arise! How do you get a girl to like you? That’s a post for another day I suppose. ”
    I am anticipating that post!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Great post! I feel your pain….my friends are always telling me my standards are way too high. Oh really? At least I didn’t just finish complaining about my crappy boyfriend who just cheated on me for the third time. I’m looking for something extraordinary and lasting. Stay true to your yourself and don’t get disheartened, to quote HIMYM “she’s getting here as fast as she can” :)

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Hey TJ, this is super awkward but one of my young women leaders can across your blog and read your idea of a perfect women to us and I didn’t realize it was you until I got home and looked up your other posts! I think you’re an amazing writer! Hope everything is great with you!
    Love, Kaylynn Bennett (EFY 2014)

    Liked by 1 person

  7. First of all your hilarious, I find your posts to be funny like I was just talking to my best friend.
    I admire that you have kind of idea and standard when it comes to the person you want to date and be with. There is nothing wrong with the points that make. You are the one that will be with this woman for the rest of your life so why not make sure you two are compatible. Now, if i could only more guys had the same mindset as you I would have more options in guys in my area to consider.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Hi TJ
    It’s Janice from your blogging101 class. I’ve seen you at my Blog Reflections mycurrentnewsblog.com. I think you might even follow me. If you do, great news! I am writing a study on how a man knows when a girl is “a keeper,” you know, the one. I needed these answers. I don’t know many single men in their 20’s so this post helped a lot. You will be anonymous of course. What a coincidence, huh! Thanks for the support, and I hope you’re feeling better.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I never get tired on reading your post and my friend, this is one another great post! :D Well, you’re not being picky. You are just preparing yourself for the future. There are girls who fits in your ideal but the problem is #1 & #2. It really depends on the sparkly moments of like.

    I hope you can find that girl soon!

    Tina – https://tinaarnado.wordpress.com/

    Liked by 1 person

  10. TJ, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being picky. My friends tell me that I am picky, but it is worth the wait for the person who will fit what you want. Your list is not unrealistic, therefore, hold on, she is somewhere having her own list similar to yours.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. TJ your #3 is vital in having a successful relationship. I am happy that at your age that you not only know this but you rate it high on your list. So many people young, old and everything in between are focused on themselves they miss the beauty in others. If you find a woman that holds up to numbers 1 – 4 then you should be all set with 5, 6 and anything else you desire as you mature into the man your meant to be.

    You should thank your parents for being excellent role models to instill you with values that look beyond the skin and straight through to the heart. Best of luck and I look forward to learning more as you take this journey.


    Liked by 1 person

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